Monday, February 16, 2009

Whose problem is it?

One mom wrote about her success in allowing her children to solve their own problems. After completing the third lesson in the Priceless Parenting class, she described what she tried and how the new parenting techniques worked:

'Fresh off Lesson #3 from today’s parenting course, I jumped into it with vigor.

“I’m bored!” my son whined.

“Oh, what are you going to do?” I asked.

He was stunned.

Normally, I offer helpful hints, tips and tricks to avoid the Boredom Monster. After he recovered from his initial shock, my son said, “I think I’ll call Anton.” He quickly got distracted with something his sister was doing, then proudly announced 30 minutes later that he decided now would be a good time to call his friend. They made a playdate. After a quick peck on the cheek, he was out the door.

My daughter, who tends to challenge me wherever I go, looked me squarely in the eye and said, “I’m doing the rest of my homework after dance class.” She laid out a sensible plan. “Sounds like you know what you are doing!” was all I said. Another stunned silence ensued. No bickering? Commanding? Bossing around? I smiled sweetly and wished her good luck. My daughter looked about her, put on her shoes, and left for Hip Hop.

Fast-forward a few hours. The kids came home. My daughter dilly-dallied. It started to get late.

“Oh, didn’t you say you were going to read outloud?” She claimed she already had. When I reminded her she had said she would do so in front of her father, she had no where to go. “Are you going to read now or after your shower?” She started to squirm. I could tell my calm, question-based parenting was started to sink in. It really is her responsibility to make certain things get done in her life.'

I love hearing about the positive changes parents experience using the ideas from the online Priceless Parenting class!
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