Thursday, July 31, 2008

Asking questions, ignoring answers

There was a parent discussion around a three-year-old girl who was giving her dad the cold shoulder. One parent suggested asking her if she would like to go to the store with him but if she said no then taking her anyway so that the two could spend time together.

The problem with that approach is that by asking her “Do you want to go to the store with me?” she’s being given a choice. If the child really doesn’t have a choice about going to the store, then that question should not be asked. The child could instead be given a choice like “Would you like to fly to the car like a bird or jump to the car like a bunny?”

Whenever parents give a child a choice they need to be ready to abide by the child’s decision. Choose choices carefully!
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